Month: June 2010

A Welcome Addition to the Literature

Sue Fagalde Lick Childless by Choice Project, Laura S. Scott, Two is Enough

There’s a new book out I wanted to share with you:

Two is enough: A Couple’s Guide to Living childless by Choice by Laura S. Scott, Seal Press, 2009.

Scott has made voluntary childlessness her mission in life. She founded the Childless by Choice Project and has conducted extensive surveys and interviews to present a clear picture of what it means to be childless by choice. Although a tad didactic–we don’t all care about the statistical details that she seems to labor so hard over–this is a well-researched and sympathetic book. Scott offers sound advice for those who have not yet made the decision of whether or not to have children. She also provides extensive information and resources, including books, groups and websites. Overall, Scott’s view is that we need to learn to accept each other, no matter what our choices are regarding parenthood, and this book is a good step in that direction. If you changed the theme from childfree to childless by marriage, this is the type of book I originally set out to write, although mine has changed in scope over time. Check it out.

Sex and No Baby

Sue Fagalde Lick childlessness, Sex and the City

I just saw the second “Sex and the City” movie last weekend. To those who criticize its total lack of redeeming social value, I say, what’s wrong with just having fun? But beyond that, it really grabbed my attention when the question of whether or not to have children came up. If you haven’t seen the movie, I hope I’m not spoiling anything. Early in the movie, Mr. Big asks Carrie if she wants to have children, and she says she doesn’t think so. Throughout the movie, she makes a point of their marriage being just the two of them forever. One couple reacts rather badly when she tells them that they aren’t having children. I wonder now if Carrie says she doesn’t want kids because she’s pretty sure Big doesn’t want them.

We can all guess what Samantha’s views on motherhood would be: forget about it. Charlotte and Miranda both have kids. So we see at least two sides of the question of whether or not to be parents and how it affects one’s life.

Is “Sex and the City” unrealistic and over the top? You bet. It’s sheer fantasy. But even here, our characters come up against those who believe that the next step after marriage must be motherhood.

Comments?