Did You Miss These Top Ten Childless by Marriage Posts?

Dear friends,

I’m recovering from a surgical procedure I had yesterday. It’s no big deal, I promise, but it has left me feeling a bit puny. I keep thinking about being old and on my own. Not having kids or a partner means you may have no one to drive you to and from the hospital or to hang around and make sure you’re all right afterward. That’s something to consider when you’re planning a life without children. But you don’t need to hear me whine, so let’s step back and take a look at what’s happening here at the blog.

Since Aug. 2007, I have published 859 Childless by Marriage posts. I’m hoping to get to 1,000 before I hang it up, but I’ll be honest. I’m running out of ideas. The older I get, the harder it is to reach back to my fertile years and remember how I was feeling then. I will continue to mine the internet, podcasts, books, and other media for inspiration. Usually even when I wake up with nothing, God or the muse provides the spark of an idea and I get busy writing. Today not so much.

WordPress, my blogging platform, gives me stats showing which posts attract the most attention. From the past year, here are the top ten:

  1. Who Do You See as Your Childless Role Models?
  2. Is the ‘Happiest Place on Earth’ Only for People with Children?
  3. Media Depictions of Childlessness Miss the Mark
  4. Can a Dog or Cat Take the Place of a Human Baby?
  5. When People Having Babies on TV Make You Cry
  6. ‘You’re So Lucky You Don’t Have Kids’—Are We?
  7. Childless Marriage: Would I Do It Again?
  8. Want to Be Seen as Radical? Don’t Have Children
  9. Once Again, They Assume Everyone has Children
  10. Different Generations Have Different Ideas About Having Children

If you missed any of these, I encourage you to read them and comment on them. Scroll around to see what else is there. What would you like to see discussed at Childless by Marriage? Is there something bugging you that we have not addressed or need to take another look at? Let me know. I need your help to keep this thing going. If you feel inspired to write a post yourself, do it. See the guidelines on this page and give it a shot. The Childless by Marriage community works best when we do it together.

Happy Valentine’s Day, dear ones. Here is my virtual Valentine to every one of you.

Photo by alleksana on Pexels.com

Question mark photo by Leeloo The First on Pexels.com

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Is the ‘Happiest Place on Earth’ only for people with children?

Should childless adults be allowed to visit the Disney theme parks? At least one angry mom says no. Her tirade against park visitors without children went viral after she called for a ban on so-called Disney Adults. The grownups are clogging the lines so she has to wait forever with a cranky toddler. They’re in the way and demonstrating bad behavior, and they shouldn’t even be there, she said. It’s a family park, she proclaimed.

Thank God Walt Disney established Disneyland and the parks that followed with the mandate they should be places for all ages to have fun. That includes adults without children. Me, I don’t yearn to go to Disneyland. Been there, done that, but I have loved ones who go to Disneyland every chance they get. They don’t have kids, but so what? The Mickey Mouse ears come in all sizes.

The parents who dislike having non-parents invade their space say we couldn’t possibly understand what it’s like taking a toddler there. I think we do understand. It’s not like we have never seen a child. Ages ago, my late husband and I took his daughter and two-year-old granddaughter to Disneyland. Yes, it was challenging. Also fun. We didn’t pay any attention to who had children and who did not. I also went there as a young adult with friends. Why not?

I’m sure you could find parents at any theme park, water slide, Chuck E Cheese pizza parlor, puppet show, or playground who want to scream, “Get out of here! You don’t belong. This is for families.” We might claim our own spaces and scream back, “No kids here! This is for grownups.”

The word “family” is so loaded. In most cases in the U.S., it’s code for grownups with children. “It’s a family movie”=for children. It’s a “family restaurant”=bring your kids and if anyone complains, tough.” “It’s a family party”=games, food, and music will all be for children. If you don’t have kids, don’t bother coming.

Where does that leave us? Are we not part of a family even if it doesn’t include children? Too many people seem to think that if you never had children, you don’t have a family. How many times have you been asked, “When are you going to start a family?”

What is a family? As this New York Times article explains, there is no easy answer these days. The standard family definition of mom, dad and two kids has given way to many different combinations of people united by blood or love. It does not have to include children.

Online definitions abound.

From the Encyclopedia Britannica:

“a group of persons united by the ties of marriage, blood, or adoption, constituting a single household and interacting with each other in their respective social positions, usually those of spouses, parents, children, and siblings.”

From the Urban Dictionary:

“A group of people, usually of the same blood (but do not have to be), who genuinely love, trust, care about, and look out for each other.”

My worn-out Merriam Webster’s has more definitions of family than I have space to list. They include: “a group of people living under one roof; people of common ancestry; a group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation.”

Bottom line: a family is whatever you want it to be. Like me and my dog.

What do you think? Should childless adults be welcome into the Magic Kingdom without kids? Why or why not? Do you find yourself being excluded from “family” activities? What is a family to you? I welcome your comments.

photo by Bo shou at pexels.com

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